Full disclosure: I love cooking and I hope to be really good at it someday.

Sometimes the pressure I put on myself when i cook makes me feel like Gordon Ramsey is peering over my shoulder disdainfully while I’m cooking – peering, sneering, and preparing blistering insults.

This sense of culinary inadequacy strikes at the most ridiculous times. Today, for example, I once again felt the cold dead eyes of judgment upon me. I was certain I was being measured and found wanting for the creaminess of the sauce and the bite of the pasta I was preparing for my daughter’s Mac & cheese. Does she care? No, she’s 5 – but that doesn’t stop me from stressing…

See, in this house we don’t just make Mac & cheese – we make pains to construct it artfully, carefully, with an eye toward presentation.

We begin with the all natural Annie’s Organic Shells & Cheddar (by far the best tasting – and least woody – ‘gourmet’ Mac we’ve found…with the possible exception of the Peace Pasta Parmesan of the same brand. But, alas, our daughter is so over that flavor so we’ve totally moved on…).

After gently boiling the pasta shells for precisely 8 minutes we pour them into a colander and allow them to drain.

In the meantime we prepare the sauce. Our secret lies in tweaking the ratio of butter to milk. The directions on the box call for two tablespoons if butter and a quarter cup of milk – and here’s a sign of our genius – we use about three tablespoons of butter (soy free, all natural margarine, actually…) and just a splash of milk (substitute) to enhance the texture. See? I can already tell you’re in awe of our prowess.

We gently heat the butter (soy-free, all natural margarine) and milk (substitute) over medium heat until it’s melted and then we whisk in the powdered sauce, er…, stuff. Then, and only then, do we add the pasta back into the mix, tenderly folding it all together until the sauce has thickened and the shells are evenly coated with a lovely sheen of cheese sauce.

The end result is the perfectly smooth and creamy, sauce-impregnated, al dente pasta we all imagine when we’re craving Mac & Cheese, but rarely ever achieve in the real world. Worthy of being enshrined in the greatest frescoes of the Italian renaissance, but also perfectly suitable for a 5 year old’s lunch.

Eat your heart out, Gordon.

Photo by: ginnerobot